i touched a dick once and it was the scariest thing in my life because it had a really cold head and i don’t know it wasn’t fun
sometimes the ‘i’ and ‘u’ shouldn’t be so close on the keyboard
Villains have surprisingly peppy ringtones.
maybe it was Mark Sheppard trying to signal Moffat and Gatiss to get him on Sherlock
“Three blokes sitting outside the pub lift their heads as they hear a car engine rumbling, to their disbelief, the iconic 2008 Holden ute flies overhead, nothing but the wooping of the two young boys driving it and AC/DC blasting out of the sound system can be heard.”
“You’re a cunt Harry” says Hagrid, Harry looking like a stunned mullet.
“Oi nah fuck off mate” replies Harry, disbelief written all over him.
Science experiment: Who is easiest to summon?
Egberts?
Pizza?
John Green?
A vegan?
The only way to find out is to reblog and wait. Wait patiently. Just wait. It will be good I promise.
fuck you vegans aren’t your source of entertainment you animal killers.
and the vegan wins
I WAS RIGHT.
do people actually stand in front of a microphone for hours making weird gibberish sounds for them to use in the sims games
because if so then i need to see this happen at least once in my lifetime
if not more
THAT. LAUGH.


















